itt: pretend to be american

[MAMP]

i have stronger opinions on fast food than i do on world politics

 

[MAMP]

i get annoyed when people think los angeles is the capital of california but i can locate at most 3 countries in africa on a map

 

[MAMP]

i like to make jokes about how dangerous australian wildlife is while living in a country where i can't go camping without a real risk of being attacked by a fucking bear

 

[drampa's grandpa]

I either love my country to the point where it's weird or hate it.

O wait I am A Merican

 

[Yung Dramps]

ooh ooh aah aah police officer-gar kill black man for loitering

 

[Clambats]

But... bear attacks are actually pretty rare in the US. I say this mostly in defense of bears.

 

[Ununhexium]

i like making fun of america because it makes me edgy and cool

 

[MAMP]

i go into threads for people to vent about americans and make bad posts

 

[Mova]

we integrate cheese into too much of our food

 

[cityscapes]

i have an unhealthy obsession with the word "based"

 

[CaffeineBoost]

Hi.

 

[Tadasuke]

o heck my xtra large gun pizza is 5 minutes late time to burn down an arby's and cough on the homeless

 

[Plague von Karma]

I get annoyed when people measure speed in miles per hour instead of glazed doughnuts per bald eagle

 

[earl]

we integrate cheese into too much of our food

I became lactose intolerant earlier this year and am now forced to agree

 

[CaffeineBoost]

Hi.

I think my accent could do with some work.

 

[Plague von Karma]

I get uncontrollably scared when someone shows political views that would be considered normal and/or centrist-aligned in the current year. I will instantly assume these beliefs are communism instead, despite not actually understanding what communism as a belief is. I have been thoroughly indoctrinated by the red scare and am doing nothing to dig myself out of it. I can't even differentiate communism and socialism, because the US education system has hard-wired me to serve as a cog in the machine that keeps the capitalist system unopposed and unchecked. It's been overrun with corrupt individuals and I'm being forced to work multiple jobs to maintain a stable income. The government and available parties fail to represent my political beliefs, and continue to fuel the bourgeoisie. Please send help.

 

[BW Tyler]

Everytime October comes around I get as addicted to Pumpkin spice as I am addicted to nicotine

 

[earl]

I have covid

 

[BW Tyler]

I have covid

Bro you should use essential oils that usually helps me

 

[Plague von Karma]

My country's historical revisionism in schools has fueled the delusion that my country is perfect, and I will continue to propagate the lies for I have been given no reason to disbelieve it.

 

[pac]

My country has alot of positive things about it!

• We have a large variety of multicultural and delicious food, as well as some good american food.
• uuuuuuuuuuuuh idk

 

[Wigglytuff]

as an American I’m actually pretty interested in the stereotypes we’re given from the outside.

So far we’ve got the typical ones: fat (fast food), stupid/ethnocentric (don’t care about world politics, can’t name >3 countries in Africa), patriotic (but not as a compliment), cops that suck, too much cheese (see: fat)

^ I agree with most of the above

some posts that I think missed the mark, speaking as someone that lives in the middle of the US:

I get annoyed when people measure speed in miles per hour instead of glazed doughnuts per bald eagle

you could’ve easily made this about how Americans do not know the metric system at all...missed opportunity

i have an unhealthy obsession with the word "based"

I’ve actually never heard people use the word based outside of Smogon/memes, living in either a rural (Iowa) or urban (Iowa, but an actual city in Iowa) setting. Must be a meme culture thing.

i like to make jokes about how dangerous australian wildlife is while living in a country where i can't go camping without a real risk of being attacked by a fucking bear

overall i give this thread a 6/10 on accuracy. keep it going

 

[BW Tyler]

as an American I’m actually pretty interested in the stereotypes we’re given from the outside.

So far we’ve got the typical ones: fat (fast food), stupid/ethnocentric (don’t care about world politics, can’t name >3 countries in Africa), patriotic (but not as a compliment), cops that suck, too much cheese (see: fat)

^ I agree with most of the above

some posts that I think missed the mark, speaking as someone that lives in the middle of the US:

you could’ve easily made this about how Americans do not know the metric system at all...missed opportunity


I’ve actually never heard people use the word based outside of Smogon/memes, living in either a rural (Iowa) or urban (Iowa, but an actual city in Iowa) setting. Must be a meme culture thing.

overall i give this thread a 6/10 on accuracy. keep it going

I am offended by what you are saying and I am a KPOP stan on twitter.
Therefore, you are cancelled.

 

[xzern]

looks like an appropriate plase to post one of my favorite videos..

 

[Plague von Karma]

I like ranting on the internet about topics I know nothing about, especially ones regarding sexuality and ethnicity because of my horrific self image issues. I will usually change my profile picture to one of me in shades in my excessively large car when doing this. On a side note, I will park like an asshole with this car, making it impossible for anyone else to do so.