If you could have a pokemon IRL, what pokemon would it be?

Vaporeon. We'd be robbing a bank and I's be all, go! Vaporeon! Do that cool melt thing into the sewers where youl be safe, because i don't think i'm gonna make it out of here buddy
Yea I imagine alot of Vaporeon will be "robbing" sperm banks.

Klinklang. And NO, I do not want it for sexual reasons. I know no one asked but I just want to make that clear. Like, that's gross. I just think gears are cool.
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Mega Lopunny, for obvious reasons...





I'm a fan of kickboxing :puff:
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also I'll pick Mawile obviously.
 
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Basculegion, riding on its back seems really cool!
i have a crippling fear of ghosts and water

also smh picking Klinklang is cheating since its two pokemon combined into one (klink)
same gos for Magneton and Klinklang's pre evo, whatever its called.
Interesting first choice, don't know much about what this would require. Probably a lot of food, right? It's a ghost though, so I'm not sure. It'd probably stay alive for ages because of it being a ghost as well. Can't think of much that could happen to it or make it a bad choice, so that's a good choice!

it's klang (not joking)
Klink, Klang, Klingklang. I did not google this, this is just what I remember the evo line being. If i'm wrong, shame be upon me.

Problebly tapu koko, just because I think it would be cool to walk down the street while you just have tapu koko floating by your side. Lol
This is just fun. I would enjoy being able to walk down the street with a Tapu Koko by my side. As Doduodrio said though, it could be a problem for electronics though. It's also a pretty intimidating mon, so I can see somebody shooting it out of fear. Also, "It has a hair-trigger temper but forgets what made it angry an instant later." and "if a person or Pokémon puts it in a bad mood, it will become a malevolent deity and attack." This would definitely be a hard mon to keep from just absolutely murdering someone, but it sounds like a fun choice and can't cause that many problems, right?
 
Interesting first choice, don't know much about what this would require. Probably a lot of food, right? It's a ghost though, so I'm not sure. It'd probably stay alive for ages because of it being a ghost as well. Can't think of much that could happen to it or make it a bad choice, so that's a good choice!


Klink, Klang, Klingklang. I did not google this, this is just what I remember the evo line being. If i'm wrong, shame be upon me.


This is just fun. I would enjoy being able to walk down the street with a Tapu Koko by my side. As Doduodrio said though, it could be a problem for electronics though. It's also a pretty intimidating mon, so I can see somebody shooting it out of fear. Also, "It has a hair-trigger temper but forgets what made it angry an instant later." and "if a person or Pokémon puts it in a bad mood, it will become a malevolent deity and attack." This would definitely be a hard mon to keep from just absolutely murdering someone, but it sounds like a fun choice and can't cause that many problems, right?
Wow Your right, I did not think about all that. I just thought "well tapu koko looks cool I bet it would be coll to have one." I still think it would be cool though
 
:ss/zygarde-10%:

its a doggo, but it can transform into whatever the fuck this is

:ss/zygarde-complete:
Zygarde is just a living breathing Transformers... thing! Just keep it away from the freezer and don't let it transform indoors. It can probably take quite a few hits too, as it's a literal mass of cells that can break apart and reform at will.
 

fx

moon tourism
is an Artist Alumnusis a Forum Moderator Alumnus
weedle i want a weedle i am going to breed twenty weedle and have a weedle farm and then ill release all the weedle into florida and they will destroy the populations of native species and i will watch as weedle importation slowly becomes a high profile crime
 
I’d want my boi, the absolute Chad jellyblob, :reuniclus:

He is cute, cool, powerful, and probably gives soft and squishy hugs.

Other alternatives include Ivysaur (an absolute lad), Shuckle (can literally make wine and is just a goofy dude), Buzzwole (new personal trainer/bodyguard/bro), and Polteageist (idk I think he might taste good)
 
magikarp. ill keep it in my bathtub or get a large tank or something. its innocuous enough that it wont get me in trouble with The Man, it doesnt have any freaky powers so it wont draw attention to me, and it can pass of as a rather large fish to those not versed in japanese childrens shows. i could show it off to friends (look at this fish I got from the pet shop doesnt it look like a magikarp hehe) and take youtube vids and stuff, itd be so cool

THEN WHEN THE TIME COMES ill feed it some candies and smash some bugs with it and become the destroyer of cities and unleash its true powers to take over the world. nobody will see it coming.........
 
magikarp. ill keep it in my bathtub or get a large tank or something. its innocuous enough that it wont get me in trouble with The Man, it doesnt have any freaky powers so it wont draw attention to me, and it can pass of as a rather large fish to those not versed in japanese childrens shows. i could show it off to friends (look at this fish I got from the pet shop doesnt it look like a magikarp hehe) and take youtube vids and stuff, itd be so cool

THEN WHEN THE TIME COMES ill feed it some candies and smash some bugs with it and become the destroyer of cities and unleash its true powers to take over the world. nobody will see it coming.........
Sounds very sane, I approve of this use! However, don't you get the candies from murdering/catching more Magikarp? How are you going to do that if you only have this one Magikarp? I guess it might be able to breed with normal fish, but then this brings the question that everyone asks but no-one knows the answer to - how do you make pokemon candies? How does Willow do it? There's the joke about him just murdering the mon and making it into candy, but what about when you catch a pokemon? My theory is that Willow is secretly the god of the pokemon universe, making mons more powerful and evolving them with candies whenever. And when you catch a mon, he just chucks a few of the candies at you to offload his job a little. Other than the semantics though, great choice for world domination/murder/whatever you want to do after destroying cities.

Also, thanks Doduodrio (and others) for doing the stuff while I was ignoring this thread.
 
also time to double post because i forgot to do more than the last one heck yeah
I’d want my boi, the absolute Chad jellyblob, :reuniclus:

He is cute, cool, powerful, and probably gives soft and squishy hugs.

Other alternatives include Ivysaur (an absolute lad), Shuckle (can literally make wine and is just a goofy dude), Buzzwole (new personal trainer/bodyguard/bro), and Polteageist (idk I think he might taste good)
Reuniclus is one of my top 10 pokemon, probably even top 3. It's a great choice, with only slight bias from me. Can't see many bad things happening because of it, and a cool dex entry - "It’s said that drinking the liquid surrounding Reuniclus grants wisdom. Problem is, the liquid is highly toxic to anything besides Reuniclus itself." So uhh, maybe don't ingest Reuniclus. Now, as for Ivysaur, I can agree. An absolute lad. In my eyes, gives off an aura similar to Breloom (the best pokemon), but on a lesser scale. Shuckle making wine, now that could be a business. And it can also tuck into it's shell, right? Just becomes a weird decoration when you need it to be inconspicuous. Buzzwole sounds great on paper, (personal trainer, bodyguard, bro) it can apparently "pulverize a dump truck with a single punch." So you better be prepared to be charged with multiple accounts of murder. Now, Polteageist. Ghost, so it is hard to kill. However, "When angered, it launches tea from its body at the offender’s mouth. The tea causes strong chills if swallowed." Strong chills, aye? Maybe don't drink Polteageist. Those strong chills seem ominous.
I’d own a Kartana. Small, portable, aesthetically pleasing, essentially a strap if I ever get mugged with it on me
"It seems not to attack enemies on its own, but its sharp body is a dangerous weapon in itself." Solid choice so far, as it apparently doesn't attack people at random! That's pretty cool. However, portable is questionable. After all, how are you going to stick it in your pocket without getting cut? It sounds problematic for really only that reason. I'm kind of imagining a non-violent sentient lightsaber that can't be turned off. It just kinda cuts through random things on accident, but otherwise is a good little friend. And it can be violent if required, so that is nice for muggings and other such stuff. Though, like with Buzzwole, you're gonna have to explain how the person mugging you ended up getting literally cut in half. Could be difficult to explain.
 

BIG ASHLEY

ashley
is a Community Contributor
magikarp. ill keep it in my bathtub or get a large tank or something. its innocuous enough that it wont get me in trouble with The Man, it doesnt have any freaky powers so it wont draw attention to me, and it can pass of as a rather large fish to those not versed in japanese childrens shows. i could show it off to friends (look at this fish I got from the pet shop doesnt it look like a magikarp hehe) and take youtube vids and stuff, itd be so cool

THEN WHEN THE TIME COMES ill feed it some candies and smash some bugs with it and become the destroyer of cities and unleash its true powers to take over the world. nobody will see it coming.........
you have been awarded one posting point (have i done this correctly?)

I’d own a Kartana [...] essentially a strap
ouch!
 
DAMMIT I FORGOT BRELOOM
Now, as for Ivysaur, I can agree. An absolute lad. In my eyes, gives off an aura similar to Breloom (the best pokemon)
I LOVE BRELOOM HE IS MY SON AAAAAAAAAA
Firstly, looks innocuous. Secondly, WHABAM, he just punched you in the face from across the room. Thirdly, he's a mushroom boye, which gives him Spore access, so he's super useful if I can't sleep. He's cute, cool, powerful, probably tasty, and is overall a friend. I could comfortably stroll in the park with him and simultaneously feel badass and comforted by the presence of my mushroom lad.
 
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