Grammar-Prose Workshop v4

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Mathy

i'm not chien pao
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Decided to try my hand at this, also I'm trying an unconventional markup system with blue text used for replacements instead of writing out both the old and new text, which IMO makes the changes far more readable, although it does sacrifice the inline comparison to the old text. LMK how I did!

Key: insert change remove (misc comment)

Specs Decidueye is one of the most devastating wallbreakers in NeverUsed. Only Skuntank and Sap Sipper Miltank resist or are immune to Decidueye's STAB combination, and the former cannot reliably switch into multiple Leaf Storms. Additionally, Leaf Storm and Shadow Ball have excellent synergy: (comma->colon) the former nails Dark-types like Silvally-Dark and Alolan Persian, while the latter hits Steel- (+hyphen) and Poison-types like Silvally-Steel, Ferroseed, (+comma) and Garbodor, as well as Rotom-Fan. Hurricane compliments these two moves well, providing coverage for Sap Sipper Miltank and chunking(interesting word choice?) Eldegoss for more damage than Shadow Ball. Although U-turn is preferred for pivoting, Roost provides Decidueye more defensive utility (rewritten for conciseness/word choice). Giga Drain is also an option that offers recovery, albeit less than Roost.
 

Adeleine

after committing a dangerous crime
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hey, mathy! glad to see you :)

i'd recommend doing comments that are alongside additions, like (rewritten for conciseness/word choice), in the different comment color (purple in your case). that way, if someone zones out fsr when implementing, they won't forget to remove your comment.

afaik the reason we write out both the old and new text is so the check serves as a change diff; the writer knows what was changed and how, which is especially important for subjective changes. eg to evaluate this check im also gonna be pulling up the original writing sample for comparison purposes. feel free to ask any other gpers about this, though.


"Specs" should be "Choice Specs". item names always go unabbreviated

"Rotom-Fan" should be "Rotom-S". to quote from standards: alternate rotom formes should be written as "Rotom-A (where A is C for the lawn mower, H for the toaster, W for the washer, F for the refrigerator, S for the fan, and A for their DPP counterparts which are treated as a singular Pokemon tiering- and analysiswise)". c cut, h heat, w wash, f frost, s spin, if that helps.

"compliments" (meaning: says something nice about) should be "complements" (works well alongside)

i'm personally in accord that chunking is "interesting" but it's valid and all iirc. one could go into minutiae and say "chunking for more damage" is awkward because "chunking" means something like "hit for a lot of damage" and "hit for a lot of damage for more damage" would be silly. i'd slightly prefer replacing chunking with a more generic like "hitting" for this reason. but, again, minutiae! really not our focus here, i'd debate if i even valued the change enough to execute it and remove some of the author's voice

re U-turn: although the original "abusing" is indeed wrong, the original analysis gave a valuable tip by implying decidueye forces switches fairly often and u-turn has a specific benefit of maximizing benefit from that. we could keep the original idea and fix the bad phrasing by saying like "Although U-turn is preferred to take advantage of the switches Decidueye forces, Roost..."

i disagree with the giga drain change (although of course then -> than is correct). roost's flaw of passivity and giga drain avoiding that flaw is relevant info that helps us decide between the moves. if you're worried that the original phrasing implied giga drain was as productive in recovery as roost, and that worry motivated the change you made, you could say like "Giga Drain is also an option that provides some recovery..." to imply the appropriate message

that's all i could find to comment on. ofc lmk if you have any sort of question. well done!
 

Tea Guzzler

forever searching for a 10p freddo
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I hope this still alive since it seems like a good training opportunity
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Polteageist is one of the most threatening setup sweepers in underused UU, capable of OHKOing a large majority of the tier when at +2 after a Shell Smash., only being unable to reliably 1KO a few Pokemon such as Zarude, Incineroar, Umbreon, Bisharp or Gigalith. (mentioned later) Its Ghost-type Ghost typing and decent Special Bulk Defense enable it to set-up (removed hyphen) fairly reliably on opponents such as Heliolisk, (removed comma) and Noivern, making it harder for a lot of the tier to punish set up and prevent a lategame clean which it can use as Shell Smash opportunities to sweep late-game when walls like Umbreon and Zarude have been removed. Stored Power abuses exploits the boosts acquired by Shell Smash to boost its power to be able to more effectively target threaten bulkier foes as well as Ghost immunities and Normal-types, such as Heliolisk and Porygon-Z. It can also one-hit KO Heavy-Duty Boots Chansey at +4; a second Shell Smash allows Stored Power to OHKO Chansey lacking Eviolite. specified non-evio chansey rather than boots chansey because knock exists Giga Drain compliments Polteageist's coverage, targeting targets Krookodile, Obstagoon, (comma) and SpDef specially defensive Rhyperior, which are not killed by Polteageist's other movies even when boosted. which can withstand Polteageist's other attacks, and can potentially restore enough HP to re-activate Focus Sash. Giga Drain also grants Polteageist some recovery, which can help it healing to 100% and be able to activate its sash if it has been chipped. A Focus Sash gives Polteageist guaranteed setup against almost any foe, allowing it to bypass Pokemon that would ordinarily OHKO it and use Shell Smash to clean-up weakened teams lacking priorities. foes lacking priority or multi-hit moves, making a sweep easier provided Polteageist is not damaged; alternatively, White Herb functions if Polteageist has taken damage, but does not guarantee survival. White Herb is also an option to give Polteageist more bulk after setting up so it can take a hit while boosted, but the ability to set-up against almost any foe is often too useful to give up. It also struggles to take priority attacks such as Bisharp's Sucker Punch even with its Def restored.
I don't know when this was originally written but Bisharp is not currently legal in Gen 8 UU (last sentence). As far as I can tell, this is bordering on what GP is supposed to do (changing the presentation of the analysis content rather than the content itself), however this is still just outright wrong so presumably i'm allowed to remove it?
 
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